Scanxiety setting in…

Well, next week I am due for my first CT scan since surgery #2…. I haven’t even had the test yet and I am already feeling anxious, nervous, concerned, worried… etc.   Ughhh…. back to reality for a while….. so will my winter holiday be spent in a chemo clinic or in Mexico for a week?  My vote is for a trip somewhere, a place where I am not a patient, but a tourist instead.  Unfortunately my vote won’t be counted.  It’s not up to me.  It’s up to cancer and I hate that !